Features | Experience of the Divinity of Bhagavan by Devotees | Group V | Ms. Indira Priyadarshini

Ms. Indira Priyadarshini, B.Ed.,
Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning,
Anantapur Campus.

Ms. Indira Priyadarshini, a student of the B.Ed. of the Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning, Anantapur Campus narrates a few of her experiences of the Divinity of Bhagavan in her own words.

'My dreams came true when I stepped into the portals of the Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning. I had to leave my parents, brother and friends. But Swami took up all these roles of a parent, a brother and a friend, and He played them most efficiently. He immersed me in an ocean of love. More than that, the Divine guidance and assurance was always there. I have no separate miracles to narrate as my very existence is a miracle. Every second is an experience of Swami's presence beside me. If I do anything wrong, if I do not have food, if I am not studying well, if I am not keeping good health, everything is Swami's concern.

On one occasion, I was depressed due to some reason. I felt deeply that Swami was neglecting me. I used to imagine myself as a little girl holding Swami's hand, and Swami leading me. That day, owing to some reason, I broke down in front of Swami's photograph in the prayer hall and, with a deep pain in the heart, I said 'Swami, I feel You are loosening Your grip on my hand.' Half an hour later, in my room, there was a knock at the door, and a girl came in and asked 'who is Indira?' She then handed over a small card with a crayon sketch of a small girl holding Swami's hand, and Swami leading her. The words - 'I am always with you, in you, above you, around you, guiding you and guarding you' were written on it. At the bottom, the words read '- Your Swami.' What other proof do I need to say that He is always with me, above me, around me, besides me, guiding me?

On another occasion, I was selected to play a wind instrument in the band. I found it very difficult to learn. One of my teachers said that when we accept Swami as our teacher, we learn better. So, I decided that Swami should teach me to play the instrument and also help me in my studies. I told Swami 'Swami, if You are ready to teach me to play this instrument, and help me in my studies, send me two photographs of Yours by tomorrow evening.' That day, when I went for bhajan, a girl called me and gave me not two, but three, photographs of Bhagavan. I wondered why she was giving me these, and thought to myself that, may be, she was distributing them to every one. Immediately, I heard her voice from behind telling some other girl 'I am not giving them to every one!' I have no words to explain His Love.

I started learning the instrument, keeping the photograph, which I had got from the girl, in front of me. Gradually, I learnt it well and now I have been playing in the band for three years. When God Himself is the teacher, there is nothing that His students cannot learn. He makes sure that they learn either immediately or gradually. He builds confidence in them by encouraging them. He provides opportunities and different situations to learn and grow.

When I finally got an opportunity to play the instrument in front of Swami, I was elated! On that happy morning, we had the opportunity to lead Swami in procession. The same evening, I sat for darshan in the first line. Swami came, and the buggy stopped in front of me. He was talking to the lady on the other side, and I was looking at Him intently. Suddenly, He turned around with a jerk and looked deep into my eyes. His face looked very serious. I never get scared of Swami even when I did something wrong, but that day, for the first time, I was scared. I did not know what was happening to me. The next moment, Swami raised His hand so as to assuage my bewilderment. When I came back to my senses, I tried to gauge the meaning of that 'look'.

Later, after darshan, when I returned to the hostel, I noticed that the mouth piece of my trumpet was full of blood. The blood clot which had formed on my lip had burst as I pressed hard against it while blowing. The blood had oozed out. I had not noticed it. But the Divine eyes never miss a thing however minute. This is the love of a thousand mothers.

Once when I was in Puttaparthi, I was suffering from fever. I wanted to go for Swami's darshan. But my whole body was aching and I ran high temperature. By evening it was certain that I needed medical attention. Hence, two girls accompanied me to the hospital, missing darshan as the OPD was open only at that time. I was already unhappy about not having darshan myself, and now two more girls had to forego the same because of me. With this thought hanging heavy in my mind, I went to the doctor. Suddenly, there was a hustle bustle - Swami was coming! We rushed out of the hospital, and waited. He arrived. His car passed by us. He looked into each of our eyes as if to say 'you were unable to come and see Me, so I have come to see you.' We felt that the Lord came all the way to reward just two things - first, the selfless service and the helping nature of the two girls, and, secondly, my deep yearning to have His darshan.'

-- Ms. Indira Priyadarshini

(As extracted from the souvenir Ananta Prematarangini published by the Anantapur Campus of the SSSIHL on the occasion of the 80th Birthday of Bhagavan)